


House of the Barking Dog

by orphan_account



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Hardcore, Love Triangles, Lust, Sex, Slow Burn, Smut, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-23
Updated: 2015-10-23
Packaged: 2018-03-20 05:01:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3637689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Solas knows he is death at her back,and that the cost of atonement laughs at the torment of those trying to right the wrongs. After his weakness and their kiss in the Fade, Solas knows his reprieve in Fearel will make a shameful mockery of her accomplishments as Inquisitor. Solas begins the process of protecting her new heart by rejecting it. But then there was that good intentioned pup, Cullen.<br/>How can the Dread Wolf protect the heart of Fearel in her brief years left,but allow a mewling of a commander (or any other man) give her only a thimblefull of the affections and knowledge he alone could provide?</p><p>Commander Cullen observes the tragedy before him as Solas' indecision confuses the Inquisitor. He decides that it is his own time to act on his affection, while fighting with the knowledge that if Solas truly wished it, he could keep the Inquisitor for himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Dread Wolf Delivers

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not for all fluff and no stuff, so on lead-up chapters, expect something to gnaw on.  
> Now that I have finished Trespasser...expect more.

Fearel tapped on the thick wooden door and pushed it open to the great circular tower room. The creaking hinges reverberated up the hollow stone tower,and a dim light eminated from the center of the room- Veilfire caged in a cast iron brazier. It flickered from the desk that Solas stood over, and cast a dreamlike electric glow on his stance- feet spread at the ready,one arm folded over his chest and the other propped upon it at the elbow.  He rubbed a thumb over his mouth as he stared into the flames,the green reflecting eerily in his pupils. 

Fearel studied him from the shadows threshold. He stood perfectly still without acknowledging her enterance ,but she knew that he had heard her. The mage was usually their earliest warning of an enemy in the field. Then he would fight as if dancing with his staff in hand as magic exploded on the ground in pools of swirling figures and diagrams and raged through the air out of the wisted wooden conduit-

His eyes flicked upward just as her heart began to speed. And then...maybe  _sometimes_ he could even hear that thudding when she thought of him.

"Andraste's _ass_ , Solas." She covered, and walked casually toward the desk. "Do you _ever_ sleep?"

Solas tipped a corner of his mouth in a smile and matched her even tone.  _But your heartbeats betray you,my dangerous flower._

" _Aneth ara_ , my friend. The Fade calls to me, but other...things call out louder."  _  
_

The tiny creases at the corners of his eyes deepened and warmed his face.

"I sleep less and less these days, it seems."

Fearel had once asked him where he slept in the absence of any bed in his circular chamber. At this, the Fade enchanter raised an eyebrow and quietly asked what use she would make of the information. She left it alone after that. 

"To what do I owe the pleasure?"

He never allowed her to stay casual with him for long. Solas always felt too...compact. His gaze never wasted or accidential, always evaluating. Lately, he had been eyeing her with a strange curiosity that made her shift nervously whenever she was with him. He would look sideways at her when he thought she was not aware,would inspect and disassemble her beneath him.

She knew she was overcompensating for her breathing, but she still gave a long sigh and leaned against his desk with her back him. He dropped his arms and walked around the desk,mimicing her posture by leaning against the desk beside her. His upper arm brushed her shoulder and she curled the toes of her right foot. His tall stature and high cheekbones looked so arcanely semetrical that felt wrong to physically touch him. 

"You see, Solas," she paused to raise her eyebrows at him and tilt up her chin."I have a problem. The Fade and whatever else may call to you, but these new dragon scale daggers I crafted are positively screaming my name." _Surely with less adoration than I could muster in a whisper in your ear._ Solas smiled lightly,but not at her analogy.

"And," she continued "with that last earthquake and half our group stuck at the Winter court, my options of travel consist of Skyhold. If nothing else, these blades are going to hunt down one of those Great Bears that Harding told me about."

"I see,Inquisitor. And have you asked our other companions to come with?" Solas asked as if curious, but in reality he knew she had asked him last. The two had struck a careful balance after she had kissed him in the Fade. Solas thirsted for more than the sacred seconds he had been allowed to hold her.

In their brief silence, Fearel looked across the room at the mural that had appeared upon their arrival to Skyhold. A wolf howling at the night sky. She wondered again why Solas had picked this room. _It must be the arcane nature of the walls. Solas' privacy takes place in his mind._

"Dorian and Bull wont get out of their bed. Sera is ' _sick_ '," she air quoted. "Blackwall is still sulking. Cole is nowhere to be found. Varrik is visiting with Hawke,and I am not asking that bitch upstairs." At the last declaration, Solas smiled fully at her and shook his head slightly. _The grand enchantress is indeed too lofty for her station, unaware the Fen'Harel lives with her._ The silence enlongated between them. After a few moments Solas spoke.

"So that leaves me as...your last resort?" He knew it was unfair rhetoric. In truth, he missed the brief moment of unguarded honesty they had shared pressed together in the Fade. The deliberate distance between them now was... _depressing,_ he discovered. Justice had been so insistent lately.Fearel looked at the floor as the mood grew heavy.

"No, Solas. No last resort,"  She said softly.

"What am I, Lethallan?" The words succinctly tumbled out before Justice could stop them. DIRE WOLF _, SOLAS. THE FEN'HEREL THAT WILL DESTROY HER-_

"You have spent hours in my company as we talked about the mysteries of the Fade, listened to every story I have had to tell, and sought my counsel at times above your own true advisors." His voice was quiet and level,velvet. "Now, speak." His voice took on a soft command at the last word.

"Solas..."her throat hurt a little from the tension. She cleared it. "Solas," _he would never talk or glance at you twice if you did not have the anchor, dont expect such a wise and older elf to entertain the whims of-_

" _Lethallan_." She felt his warm fingertips beneth her chin. They lifted up her face and she felt the tingle of the fade where they touched. "What is troubling you?" he peered into her face, his eyes staring into hers,his face inches from hers.

"Solas, would we still be... _friends_ if I did not have the anchor?" She asked softly. Everything looked sharper with his fingers touching her. The pointed tips of his ears. The warm breath of his mouth brushing her face when he spoke. The closeness.

"It is not a reality," he intoned softly. "But if it is important to know, I doubt we would have met if not for the anchor. But if we did, I think we would have been friends." He lightly rubbed his fingers beneath her chin.

"I hope so, Solas." _It is so hard to think with your fingers on my skin._ "I feel alone. People place themselves below me and follow my decisions as Inquisitor." She met his gaze and shifted a little. His fingers were still under her chin. "But I always feel that you and I are on more equal footing."

Solas released her chin and paused a moment before wrapping one arm around her shoulders and pulling her to him. His scent was pleasant, his natural smell mixed with an earthy wood from his staff. She leaned her head against his neck and he rested his chin on her head.

 _A Vhen, talking of equal footing with the Fen'Harel._ Solas smiled to himself.  _Time changes many things. But unfortunately...not everything._

"Solas..please. Again." She moved her head out from under his chin and lifted her face to meet his. Panic flowed through Solas as the gentle sound of her body shifting against his seemed amplified in the silence of the castle. _ONLY ONCE, YOU SAID, ONLY ONCE, SOLAS._ Solas turned his face away and pressed his lips together.

 _How can a man, or Fen'Harel for that matter, deny himself? How can you think to command me, Justice?_ Fearel's eyebrows knit worriedly as she followed Solas' gaze to the wolf mural.

 _I once  danced with gods and sat at ancient war tables. I tricked all of creation into laughable destruction. And now this Vhen comes to me so simply. And I must struggle to resist her._ Solas growled and threaded his fingers through the back of her hair and pulled her beneath his chin again. He buried his nose and mouth in her black strands and breathed deeply in.

"Fearel, I must not." His words were muffled in her hair. But they still carried into the rafters where Cullen leaned, eyes narrowed at the pair.

"Why, Solas?" Her breath danced warm on the softest part of his neck and he felt a shiver up his arms.

 _A SIMPLE SLAVE VHEN CAUSING THE DREAD WOLF TO SHUDDER IN DESIRE AND HIS COCK TO ERECT._  Solas grit his teeth and pulled himself from the Inquisitor.

"Please stop your temptation, Inquisitor," he said softly, firmly, yet sad. "I cannot accept your purity." He turned and walked to the hall that lead to the ramparts, leaving Fearel alone with only the sound of the rustling of the messenger owls above and the fierce gaze of commander Cullen secretly staring down at her.


	2. The Tactician and the Fade Mage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas' eyes pierced below him to the rampart walls of the keep. He'd angered the Inquisitor with his duality. He stayed crouched in the shadows, watching hawkishly.  
> Minutes passed. Then he saw Cullen stride powerfully through the door with Fearel behind.  
> The Dread Wolf murmured a curse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The armor pieces are legitimate and indicative of 15th century suits of armor. It is the same theory for plate mail. I have made the terminology as easy as possible without having to include a list of definitions via context clues.  
> This is the second installment. I did not expect more than 10 hits, let alone a bookmark. I am excited to continue this story not only for my own enjoyment and love of aberrance, but for yours. Please enjoy.

"I understand you are looking for someone to hunt with, Inquisitor."

Fearel jerked around to see Cullen leaning on the stairwell arch that led to the rafters.

"Cullen! You scared me. How long have you been there?" Fearel felt hot embarrassment creep up the back of her neck as she replayed the conversation- _the rejection,_ she corrected _,_ with Solas. Cullen shrugged and pushed himself with his back from the archway.

_I was here long enough._

"Just a few moments, Inquisitor. I overheard your request as you yelled through the keyhole of Dorian's door and I heard his mad giggling, but I had to rush to send this letter before I could volunteer. Are you prepared to go now? I ah, obviously need to stop by my quarters first." Cullen rubbed the back of his bare neck and gave a lopsided smile. Fearel cocked an eyebrow and a grin at his naked torso and loose linen pants.

"Commander Cullen, you must have quite the following if you make wandering around Skyhold like this a habit. Do you always walk around half naked at night?" He chuckled as he strode past her.

"Only when I feel like impressing someone beautiful." Fearel felt her stomach drop, like she has missed a stair going down.

_Was Cullen..hitting on me?_

"Inquisitor-"

"Fearel. How many times must I tell you, Cullen. _Fearel_." He finally turned to her after reaching the ramparts door exit and gave a regal bow with much head bobbing and flourishes.

"Fearel, let us go hunting. Come help me with my armor?" His blue eyes met hers good naturedly and she blew an exaggerated sigh.

"Well, if we must cover you up, we must cover you up." Fearel brushed black spikes of hair from her eyes before pushing herself from the desk to follow Cullen. _If Cullen heard_ _anything_..Fearel pushed the horrifying thought aside.

 _He can't know anything is upsetting me. Still the Inquisitor,still the leader,still all of that before a female. I'll need to move on from Solas._ Fearel pursed her lips. _And Cullen is_ _the tactician of my armies. I need to be absorbent in any crisis. If he_ does _know what's going on, I need to prove I can handle it._

Fearel tried to let it go and her eyes fell on the dense sculpt of Cullen's legs and the muscles that protruded from his textured linen pants. Fearel tried to look elsewhere. _I can't just go from one guy to the next so quickly no matter how attractive Cullen is. He's brilliant, but he's not Solas brilliant_...

Fearel sighed to herself. _Don't be a whore._

 _The way she is, she wont react too much to me being_ _coy_. Cullen smiled to himself as they strode abreast and he noticed where her eyes fluttered briefly, and the corresponding blush. _I must force myself to seek her out more often like this. I must be bold for her to move away from that elf. Maker...she needs to get away from him._

Solas was no where to be seen after his hurried departure minutes before. They walked the silent ramparts to Cullen's tower, a cold breeze whistling past as a guardsman stood at attention at their approach. Cullen dismissed him with a wave and they entered the warm stone tower. Cullen strode to the practice dummy serving as mannequin for the larger parts of his heavy armor. Heavy geaves and gauntlets lay in a small wooden box beside the display. Cullen shrugged on a light linen shirt, then a tough leather gembeson with sturdy leather laces.

"All this armor, Cullen. It is good to know that at least the commander of my armies will be unscathed if this hunting trip turns sideways. I'm used to just the leathers." Cullen slid a chair to the mannequin and began to strap the cuirass on at his waist. Fearel walked around the back of the chair to tighten the shoulder straps. Cullen smelled of leather and polishing grease. There was also a distinctly manly scent. It was not sweat, but a masculine smell that made Fearel chide herself for enjoying.

"I'll leave most of the armor off so the clanking doesn't ruin our sport. But I promise that I can still protect your Inquisitor parts." Fearel smacked his shoulder good naturedly and he chuckled. "I'll be covering these, then." He hefted a gleaming paulderon from his lap and settled it on his right shoulder. Fearel began to lace the gembson straps through the paulderon openings and tightened them to Cullen.

"I remember my days in training with the Templars. As a young boy,aside from studies, I was on call to suit up the superiors before their duties. I became deft enough for them to notice. Sometimes the smallest things make a difference." Fearel nodded and moved around the chair to stand before him.

"Like seeking me out when I wanted some company." She smiled and squatted between his legs, avoiding his gaze and smiling to herself. _A little harmless flirting..._ She reached for a forearm guard from the box and clasped it around his arm. Cullen looked away as she inserted the metal hooks into the eyelets of his leathers and her breath danced over his hands and _she was kneeled ardently between his legs stripping off his bloody armor after fighting long hours defending her title as Inquisitor and she rubbed his legs with her slender hands and her pointed ear tips brushed his inner thigh as her tongue raked along-_

"All set, Cullen." She stood up from the squat and reached at her back to adjust the daggers resting in the harness.

"Yes, Fearel, let's go hunting." _But not for bear._

\--------

Solas watched the pair leave Cullen's tower and jump from the high ledge to the courtyard below. Few of the inhabitants of Skyhold had let it escape their notice that the laws of gravity had little effect- a result undoubtedly from the elven magic at the height of their worship of the old gods. But Solas exclusively seemed to know that the opposite was also true.

Knowledge was the purest power,and Solas was rich in it from the highest shadowy perches where many secret conversations unknowingly carried. What other benefits were denied the inhabitants of the earth at their now purblind state of the old ones? So many that he could remember. So much loss. Pain. So necessary. So much more was now necessary and he would be the one to bring it.

He leaped from the top of Cullen's tower to a shadowy corner of the courtyard, and followed like a whisper behind Cullen and Fearel as they crossed the massive bridge to the outer forest.

_Of course she would go with Cullen. She is feeling unwanted, she knows she must distract herself, he is an attractive male plainly interested in her..._

Cullen and the Inquisitor whispered their pererration strategy as they marched quietly over the crunching snow. Solas felt his lip curve up in a small snarl as the warm breath of their words twined together in the cold air and joined the night sky.

I _was the one spending hours of careful cogitation on the Inquisitor._ I _appreciated the lithe destruction of her foes and the sharp diatribes of injustice she is now allowed to perform as Inquisitor._   _I see her,and I see me. Before..before the Fade. She will do anything._

Solas did not glance down as he quickly twisted his fingers and then pinioned them out. Warm magic snapped across his skin. Yet _this_ Cullen _thinks it so simple as to find a woman and then just pursue her because..why?_

_Why is that wrong?_

_Because she was an attractive, intelligent woman?_

Solas paused in the snow as the duo before him slowed and moved more quietly. _I'm jealous of her attentions._ Solas felt the skin on his nose between his eyes wrinkle as Cullen placed a gauntleted hand on the Inquisitors shoulder and they nodded in acquiescence.  _Yes. This is jealousy._

Fearel was now walking a little ahead of Cullen, her toes curling in the snow as she stopped to listen. The snow bear had planted crisp tracks in an area between two groups of thick trees, and she could hear a sizable movement occurring further ahead. She stepped carefully forward, unsheathing the daggers from her back and crouching slightly. Cullen followed a few paces behind with his eyes steady on her tightly wound movements.

_Focus on the bear, Cullen. The bear._

Cullen and Fearel made their way into the clearing. The Great Bear sat in the middle of the clearing,perfectly centered as if begging to be seen in the rich,red majesty of blood that covered the front of his stomach and his rooting muzzle. The bear absent-mindedly kneaded part of his kill with a paw the size of Cullen's chestpiece. Fearel turned slightly to nod at Cullen behind her. He unsheathed a large sword from his hip and gripped it at his side,angled with both hands. Fearel stepped back with her right foot and launched herself in deadly elegance at the bear, her daggers in each hand, pointed downward in twin fangs.

She struck the bear behind the neck and back but the paralysis was not successful and the poison would take time to work on such a huge foe. The Great Bear gave a startled roar in pain and shook effervescently as Solas devoured the scene before him. Watching Fearel in danger was indubitably worse than participating in it with her. Solas gripped his warped Onyx staff so hard that his skin sounded against it like creaking leather. The milky relay stone crackled with green tendrils.

Cullen gave a battle roar and sprinted at the bear, his sword swinging upward at its neck. The blade would have struck true but the bear had reared up on it's hind legs, and Cullen instead sliced through the massive chest of the beast. Fearel had managed to pull out both daggers after their initial plunge into the bears heaving body, and launched herself away from the bear before she was ejected by it. She landed in a crouch on the ground, blades horizontal to her body, and prepared for another leap.

Cullen found her on the battlefield and positioned himself away from her, leading the bear's focus on him. Fearel suddenly felt a crackle of energy around her and tendrils of the Fade warmly wrapped themselves around her. Solas stepped fully out from behind a large tree. He arced himself and the Dragon Staff through the air in movements Fearel recognized that would invoke blunt Fade damage.

Fearel glanced at Cullen,noting that she was shielded before he was,but seconds later he too was shroud in rippling energy. Cullen sliced at the bear again,a sharp thud of his sword indicating a successful hit. Fearel waited for the Fade damage to hit before striking the last strike at the bears exposed throat as it arched in pain. Blood poured out in a hot expulsion as the blade in her left hand struck true. The blood spat out,covering her face and neck, her hands already sticky with the stuff.

The bear fell and the three stood a moment, panting in the cold night. The battle had hardly lasted a few minutes and it seemed the innards of the Great Bear were not punctured. Fearel made a loud bird call into the air and half a minute later a circling hawk came to rest on her shoulder. She unfurled a paper strapped to the leg,dipped the accompanying quill nub in the bears blood, and scribbled brief directions to the kill. After briefly stroking the bird,she gave it a nudge. It leapt off her shoulder and soared toward Skyhold.

Cullen watched the bird fly a moment and turned toward Solas.

"Maker, Solas, I thought we were alone out here!" _What the hell is this elf trying to do now?_

Solas neatly batoned his staff into the sheathe on his back and walked toward them.

"Indeed, Commander Cullen. I saw the two of you leaving the keep and thought it was in the best interest of the Inquisition for there to be more protection around...the Herald of Andraste." Fearel's eyes narrowed. Oh,the herald that Andraste undoubtedly selected, Solas?

"I assure you, Solas, _Fearel_ is quite safe with me."

Solas shrugged nonchalantly and turned back toward Skyhold.

"One can never be too careful."

Justice stirred _. SOLAS..._

_Shut up._

The trio walked back toward the keep in silence. Cullen glowered internally a few feet behind Fearel and Solas. _Damn that mage. A few hours ago he was as good as gone with whatever internal dilemma_ _his fat brain concocted and now he just can't leave her alone._ Cullen griped the sword at his hip a little harder and continued to walk.

The three continued the trudge back up to the keep. After a while, Solas eyed the inquisitor and spoke.

"That was quite a kill, Fearel."

_Oh, so I'm not the Herald anymore._

"Indeed _Ser_ Solas. It feels good to exert some energy when one is frustrated. From being stuck in the keep, of course." Fearel spoke carefully and did not meet his eye. You may play, _Solas. But I am not a game._ Cullen noticed her formal tone and tilted his mouth in a small smile at the ground.

Fearel spoke over her shoulder. "Cullen, I have never actually seen you fight before. That was quite impressive. If you were not needed as tactician of our armies, I would ask you to join us on our next journey to the Hinterlands."

"I would be bereft if I did not say I have wished it many times. I know my best place is here, but to enjoy the intensity of battle is something I truly miss. Fighting at your side is a beautiful thing to behold." Fearel noticed Solas' face mask itself in inexpression.

"Cullen, do you need help removing your armor when we return to Skyhold?" Fearel asked sweetly.

_SOLAS-_

_"_ Actually, Inquisitor, might I have a word with you about the Lyrium formulas we have developed?" Interjected Solas. "I find that there are a few  _side effects_ that we need to take into consideration." Fearel glanced at Cullen, who gave her a another lopsided grin as they approached the bridge leading to Skyhold. 

"I will be quite alright, Fearel. We had a nice departure of duties, but I'm afraid expectations are upon us again." Cullen nodded pointedly to Solas and gave Fearel a small bow.

The three parted ways in the courtyard. Fearel left to change out of her bloody clothes. Solas had stayed far enough from the battle for this to be unnecessary. He instead headed to the Undercroft where the potions table was kept. The large waterfall was barely reflecting an orange hew of the rising sun as he entered the deserted chamber. Approaching the table, he laid his palms flat against the surface and let the air from his lungs hiss between his teeth. _Cullen may be an acceptable fighter, but his demure ways will never satisfy the ferocity of Fearel. She'll be bored within a year._

_SO THIS IS MORE OF A COMPETITION NOW? OR YOU ONLY WANT HER TO KEEP HER FROM OTHERS? YOU HAVE TAKEN ENOUGH ALREADY, WOLF._

_No, it's none of that. It is that he is not worthy of her. She deserves better._

_LIKE A FORGOTTEN TRICKSTER GOD?_

_Yes, like a forgotten trickster god who holds all secrets of the Fade. The Fen'Harel will not suffer such a disgrace. I'll be damned before I see her potential go to the likes of a subservient Templar whelp._

_YOU_ ARE _DAMNED, SOLAS. AND YOUR ARROGANCE IS WHAT PLACED YOU HERE ALONE IN THE FIRST PLACE. IT WILL DESTROY YOU AGAIN, AND HER WITH YOU._

Solas made a slow fist against the table. _We are already destroyed. Together or apart. All will be destroyed. Deliberately. By my hand._

Solas relaxed the muscles of his neck and allowed his head to drop low enough for his chin to touch his chest. He stood there,staring into the grain of the table with his palms flat against it,holding his shoulders up.  _And at this point, I would not be able to focus on my journey if someone else has her. She belongs to me.That is_ all.

Solas forced himself to calm down. He breathed deeply and walked to the edge of the undercroft and held his hands beneath the ribbony strength of the waterfall. He splashed some of the water on his face and chanted a writ of peace to himself as he waited, staring at the water in silence.

After minutes of silence, Solas felt himself relax. And after a while longer,he heard the door creak open. Fearel stepped in, a slim jubba accentuating her body and flowing to her ankles. At her belt was a small selection of daggers,some of which Solas knew to be poisoned. Her hair was still slightly wet from her bath and he could smell the fresh scent of elfroot as she settled beside him.

"I won't waste any more of your time, Fearel," Solas whispered, and he placed one hand at the small of her back and one behind her head,pulling her to him. She inhaled sharply in surprise as he wove her hair between his fingers and gently tipped her head back to place a kiss on her mouth. " _Fearel,"_ he whispered, tipping her head further back and murmuring her name against the flesh of her neck. She felt the tingle of the Fade on her skin as he breathed in relief and desire. One of her hands gripped the fabric of his tunic, the other trembled as she touched his smooth head.

"Solas," she whispered, and he hefted her up against his body and set her on the potion table, sliding glass beakers and papers to the floor to crash there and seep while he throbbed for her.

"Fearel, you can have only me. No other man is to touch you or taste you as I will," He growled in her ear. "I will destroy. _Any. Other. Man._ " He moved his lips from her ear and his eyes bored into hers before looking down. "I cannot deny you. You invade all of my time in the Fade, and in this reality. My dreams are meaningless without you sleeping beside me." He placed a hand under her chin and she closed her eyes and smiled against his touch. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him against her and the table. He bumped into it with the force of her insistence. She placed her hands on either side of his head, flattening his ears against his skull and kissing beneath his chin at his neck. Solas groaned softly from his throat as she kissed lower at his collar bone. At this, he grabbed one of her wrists and pressed her hand against the table and lifted his knee on her other side so he was leaning partially over her.  
He placed his lips to her ear and spoke softly.

"I will take you to and from the fade when I _do_ take you, and you will experience it in this plane and the next."

"That's all I wanted."

The undercroft door thudded open and Dagna strode in, whistling and tossing a rune up and letting it fall into her hand. She froze as Solas and Fearel turned their heads in horror from their heated positions. Dagna slowly backed carefully through the door frame and shut the door behind her.

"I didn't see anything!" came a muffled noise from the other side of the door. "Not a thing!"

Fearel looked up at Solas and pressed her lips together in nervous humor. "I think we should continue this another time-" She snorted the stifled laughter from her throat and put her head in her hand. Solas placed a thumb over her lips and dragged down slowly,wetting it against the exposed inside of her bottom lip. A low noise murmered from his throat and he held her chin between his thumb and index finger. 

"Indeed, Fearel, another time."


	3. The Assassin and the Templar Thief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen thwarts an assasination attempt and gains an advantage over Solas.

Fearel streched languidly, arms above her head and wrists against the cool smooth stone of the balcony. Stars glittered greenly in the sky and a crisp wind flung itself at her body to curl in her hair. A warm, soft blanket surrounded her. A gift from Cullen. Fearel shifted guiltily. Solas and herself had not spoken about the Undercroft to anyone. Their relationship was hidden from the rest of Skyhold for now (with the exception of Dagna). Cullen was surely unaware of what had transpired between her and Solas, and had been providing special attention to her. It was a fact that she was sure had not escaped the attention of Solas.

At night she heard Cullen pace the halls outside her door in dedicated patrol. During the day, a devoted pair of guards followed from a distance and stood outside of her doors as she discussed tactics with the war council and drank ale with Bull in the afternoons.  

Every night since the Undercroft, Fearel returned to her quarters to find Fade-touched Plumerias scattered over her bed and filling the room with soft sweetness that reminded her of Solas' quiet voice. Fearel gathered the flowers every morning and crushed them in a personal stone grind for tiny droplets of scent, which she stored in a delicate stoppered bottle.

Fearel wiggled under the blankets and thought of Solas' body pressed against hers.  And for an oh so brief moment, she thought of Cullen and his quiet persistentce.

\----------

Cullen's armor clinked gently in the empty hall as he paced. The expansive room was devoid of delicate female nobles whispering from behind their fans and flicking coy glances at him. No soft-handed men stood in the middle of the walkways, announcing grandly their latest conquests of battle and income.

Cullen hefted the Undercroft door open and alowed himself a moment of enjoyment as clean smelling night air wafted from the waterfall before him. He tried not to think of Fearel and Solas when they were alone together in the same room he now occuppied. He and Dagna went back a long time. 

As Cullen turned to leave the room,he noticed puddles of water on the floor leading from the waterfall to the Undetcroft door. They were footprints. Cullen slammed the door and ran back into the hall. The fast diminishing water led to the door opposite him.  _Fearel's room!_  

Cullen pushed aside blind panic as he shouldered his armor-clad body through the door that led upstairs. For the first time in his life he wished the shit was off him so he could move faster. Cullen clanked up the stairs 3 at a time and opened Fearel's door without hesitation. A tall willow of a man was dipping a spindle dagger into a narrow sheath-like bottle of white fluid. His wet clothes clung to his body and accentuated the long strides he made across the room toward Fearel, who was sleeping on the balcony and clad in the gift Cullen had left her. Cullen gave an animal yell as he leapt at the assassin and tackled him to the ground.

Fearel had just started dozing and sat up abruptly to find the two men less than a foot away from where she lay, the assassin trying to writhe away from Cullen, and Cullen trying to clamber atop him.The assassin then turned his focus on Fearel and reached his dagger tip toward her, but Cullen was already straddling the man's back and punched him hard in his exposed ribs.The assassin gasped and loosened his grip on the dagger. Cullen grabbed the hilt before it hit the pallet and gripped the man by his hair. He pulled the man's head back with a growl and slashed the blade across his neck, glaring into the assassin's dying eyes.

The man's blood frothed and surged from his neck as poison reacted with flesh. It sprayed onto the blanket and Fearel. Cullen dropped the dagger and his grip on the assassin's hair. The glass infused blade shattered, the assassin's head fell with a thud almost completely on Fearel's lap. 

The following silence was filled only with a death gurgle from the assassin. Blood began to seep through Fearel's cover and she scrambled to the stone pillars of the balcony, eyes never leaving the assassin as his blood covered the place that was so safe moments ago. She pulled her knees up to her naked chest and wrapped her arms around them. Blood was smeared on her legs and stomach. 

"Fearel,"Cullen was panting, still stradling the dying assassin. 

" _Cullen,"_ she whispered in a shaky breath. Fearel didn't know how to complete her thought. She had been taken in her safe place in the most vulnerable position she could be in and was almost...

_I was almost killed in my own bed._

A tear slid out before she could stop it. She furiously wiped it away, but they kept coming. She knew she was smearing blood from the dead man's throat on her face and she couldn't get it wiped from her hands or her face and _almost_ _every surface has this mans blood on it-_

She did not see Cullen get off the man and crouch before her to grab her scrambling hands by the wrists. She dropped her head in shame and grit her teeth as her chest heaved in front of Cullen. She turned her head away from Cullen to hide her face.  _I'm crying in front of my Commander, stop it stop it!_

Cullen leaned forward from his crouch and clanked to his knees, yanking her wrists to him and gathering her to his chest. Her naked form pressed agains his smooth platemail and he wove his fingers through her hair and desperately tilted her head back. Her face was wet with tears and blood and he grit his teeth at the sight of her fear.  _My Fearel-_

He kissed her. "Andraste help me," he panted, his mind blank with fear, relief, protection, desire, pain-every thought and feeling poured into the kiss as he scrambled to touch every piece of her that he could.  _I cannot cover you enough, I cannot sink into your skin and fix this enough but you are so precious-_

She shuddered beneath him and he felt her cling to him. He gripped her tighter and his panting was no longer from his excursion with the assassin. 

"I need to be with you, Fearel," he touched her chin and leaned his forehead against hers. "I am here to protect you, I am your guardian and I would be your lover," he pressed her head to his neck and whispered in her ear. "It's me, Fearel, it needs to be me. I can't leave you alone. Solas-he isn't for you." Fearel gave a shuddering inhale at this and he felt her try to remove herself from him.

"No, Fearel. Please...let me just have this moment where I can pretend you are mine." She stopped and sagged back against him. 

"What in the  _fuck is going on here."_ A calm and steady voice spoke from the door. Cullen turned and saw Solas.

 _Shit_. Fearel realized too late that her hands were gripping the top of Cullen' chestplate at his neck and that her naked body was spread over him as close as she could be. She watched the anger play across Solas' face, then the panic as he registered the blood smeared on her own. His eyes dropped to the dead assassin on the floor and to Cullen, who still held Fearel tightly to him. Cullen turned away from Solas and buried his face in Fearel's hair. He breathed deep. "Are you okay to let go of me, Fearel?" There was a long, silent pause. She nodded her head. Cullen stood and lifted her from the ground, trying to avert his eyes from her body.

Solas strode to the large Orlais bed in the center of the room and ripped the sheet off it. He tucked the sheet over Fearel's nakedness and brushed her cheek lightly with the backs of his fingertips. Cullen sat down on the bed, breaking their contact,and looked up at Solas who stood over them. Solas looked up from Fearel and met Cullen's stare with his own. 

"Solas, please alert Josephine about the attack. We need a woman to help Fearel get clean. Lelliana will need to know of this weakness in Skyhold."

Cullen kept his voice soft and his manner formal. _Argue with me, Solas. It will only show her your care for yourself overrides your care for her. I protected her. You can clean up the rest._

Cullen knew he had Solas. Solas knew it too. Fearel had her eyes shut, blocking it out. Solas' anger, the death, the blood, that Cullen had saved her when Solas had not. It was too much. Too much. She heard Solas turn abruptly and leave the room.

Fearel squeezed herself tighter on Cullen's lap. And now Solas was pissed.  _Cullen was here...Solas was not. He must be livid. Hurry back to me, Solas._

Cullen removed his guantlets and laid his warm hands on her head, stroking her hair.

"How are you feeling?"

"I don't want to talk about it," she said softly. "Please..anything but the attempt on my life." Cullen nodded and continued stroking her hair.

"It's mean. What you did to Solas." Cullen stopped entwining his fingers in her hair. He waited a moment and rubbed her lip where Solas had, as if rubbing away his touch.

"To the victor go the spoils. If Solas cannot fight for you or cope with losing to me, do you think he is still worthy? I do not. Regardless of what is between you two, I will not allow his incompetence to bring you to destruction."

"You grow bolder every day, Cullen." She felt herself smile a little. "When we first began talking, you were so...awkward. And now you confront even the most fierce of elf kind in Solas."

"I'm not going to lie, Fearel. Watching you so close to death has made me realize that any fear I have of rejection from you is worth the possibility of your affection. I will always be waiting in the battlements for you. Even if you take Solas. He will destroy you and maybe you will recognize that before it happens. You can meet me there at any sunrise when you are ready." Cullen grew silent and looked down at her expectantly. She gazed back at him.

 _I can't bring myself to tell him to stop. Not after tonight. Not after what he has kept me from._  And so Fearel remained silent. Cullen gave her a crooked smile. It masked the euphoria that soared inside him. Then Josephene burst into the room.

"Inquisitor!" her nightgown billowed as she bustled into the room with a wash fabric.

"Oh Inquisitor, how could this happen, we have been so careful!" She gently pressed the cloth against Fearel's face to remove the blood. "I'll get you a bath started right away. Are you alright?" Fearel felt a happy familiarity with Josephine's worry.

"Thank you so much, Josie. I feel better already."

 


	4. Infandum Renovare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the assassination in which Solas decides his next course of action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Infandum Renovare- Latin. Unspeakable sorrow.  
> Ma vhenan- Elvish. My heart.  
> Lathbora viran- The path to a place of lost love. A longing for a thing one can never really know. 
> 
> Also, this is NOT the last chapter. Can't stress that enough. I'm still not satisfied with this chapter...I don't know how to fix it grr.

Solas did not hesitate to step through Fearel's open door. His eyes swept over the deserted room and to the balcony, when he halted. Fearel's bare shoulders were huddled inside of Cullen's arms. Cullen was kneeled before her, his gauntleted fingers tangled in her hair and his forehead pressed against hers as he curved over her, his chest piece heaving with his heavy breaths.

"What in the _fuck is going on."_  Fearel's head snapped to the door and Solas belatedly realized that the wild look in her eyes was not entirely passion-her face was drawn in fear, and Solas realized that she was covered- _covered in blood._

Solas' eyes raked over the scene again and saw a figure laying face down in the shadows. 

Cullen had barely turned his head to acknowledge Solas. He instead leaned closer to Fearel to murmur something in her ear. Solas grit his teeth. There was a moment where Fearel did not respond to Cullen and just looked up at him. Then she nodded her head and he scooped her up, eyes avoiding her nakedness as he walked toward the Orlais bed. Solas surged forward and ripped a sheet off the bed and covered her with it as Cullen held her against him. 

 _My_ _Fearel_ , Solas watched her cling to Cullen with shaky fingers. _I was not here to protect you. And Cullen...Cullen was. I should have been here. I should have been here._

YOU SEE, SOLAS? YOU CANNOT BALANCE YOUR PURSUIT OF THE FADE WITH YOUR PURSUIT OF THE INQUISITOR. ONE WILL ALWAYS SUFFER. Solas felt hot frustration burn on his face. But there was nothing to be done. Justice was right.  _I do not fit into her life._ And Solas decided. 

_She should know about the Vallaslin._

_\-----------_

Fearel was finally back in her bed, clean, and with the balcony doors firmly shut. Cullen had taken a more permanent watch in the hallway that led from her quarters to the throne room.

Lelliana had rushed in soon after Josephine had, her face pale and furious. After inquiring after Fearel, she briefly hugged her and promised her swift repercussion for whoever had sent the assassin. 

"But Commander Cullen has already done half of my job in so elegantly slaying your assassin," she intoned, giving a small smile to Cullen. 

Fearel last saw Solas as he disappeared to gather Josephine and Lelliana. 

There was a knock on the door. "It's Dorian, Varric and Bull!" Rang Dorians flowered voice, and the door was pushed open. Varric and Bull stood beside Dorian, who sat beside Fearel and placed his fingers under her chin to move her head around. 

"Well you look mostly unscathed, my friend. I would have been  _very_ upset if they had taken one of my only friends from me." 

"Easy now, Dorian," rumbled Bull. "I'm right here, you lump. Good to see you're okay, boss. I heard Cullen gave him quite a beating."

Varric patted Fearel's leg over the covers. 

"I'm going to visit the body after we finish here," he said. "I've seen a lot of people in my travels and could help identify him." 

Fearel leaned her head back and smiled at them. 

"The assassin is lucky that I was asleep. Cullen was nice. _I_ would have cut parts off and fed them to him."

Bull chuckled. 

"It's more lucky that old Curly was watching out for you. He seems to be taking a... _special interest_ in that lately." Varric's eyes crinkled in his sly grin and Dorian curled his mustache suggestively as he looked up in jocund and shook his head slightly. 

"Oh get off!" she pushed at Dorian and he laughed as he stood, planting a kiss at her crown and walking toward the door. Bull clapped her on the shoulder and smiled, Varric winked, and they left. 

Fearel pushed herself further beneath the covers and listened to Cullen pace. 

\-----

Hours passed. Fearel still lay in bed, staring at the canopy above her. Cullen had stopped pacing a few moments ago. Fearel's hand snaked out from the bedcovers to a dagger on her bedside table. A soft tap sounded at her door.

"It's me, Fearel," Solas' voice came muffled from behind the door. She let out her breath and heard the door open as he let himself in. The sound of his soft footfalls grew louder as he made his way to her bed in the moonlight.

She felt the bed depress beside her and the moonlight cast enough light for her to see his outline.

"Fearel. I came to tell you that I can't be here for you and do my duty."

Fearel slowly sat up and gripped Solas' averted face and turned it toward her. 

"Yes. You can. And you will."

"No," he said softly. "I have...things. Things I must do. And Cullen..that _shem_  has the luxury of caring for you more than I." Solas almost spat the words.

Fearel curled her toes.  _Cullen._  He had changed _,_ somehow. Tactician of strategy and deadly shield to the Inquisitor. The danger and wisdom of Solas was of an equal compulsion. They both knew Cullen had developed a higher standing with Fearel. 

"Solas...will you make me choose him?" Fearel placed the palm of her hand on his cheek and he moved his mouth to the center of it in a long kiss and a sigh. Fearel placed her other hand at the tip of his narrow ear and softly rubbed.

"Stay."She dropped her hand to his tan shift and pulled him to her. She pressed her cheek against his. "Stay tonight. At least tonight. _Please_ , Solas." Her breath danced over his ear in a whisper and the hair on his arms stood.

Solas made a frustrated sound in his throat and gripped Fearel's chin with his thumb and forefinger, hard. "I don't think you understand, Fearel," he growled. "I am _not staying._ A bird and a fish may love each other.  _But where would they live?"_

Solas' eyes bored into hers. Blood already drained from his face and was coursing through his penis.  _Please stop. I resist demons of the Fade every night who wish to do me harm. But you will tempt me into doing yourself the harm. Give me a reason to do it, Fearel. I will if you don't stop, I cannot._

 _"_ Even a fish can live for a few moments outside of the water," Fearel said quietly, eyes downcast to her lap. Solas felt hard pangs in his chest as her sweet voice pleaded with him _Infandum Renovare_. "Let me live just a few moments in love before my choice became a necessity."

Her face was still pulled toward his. A small tear beaded from her eye. 

"I _can't_. I can't be the man who takes you and then leaves. We already travel _Lathbora viran_. Do not destroy the road."

Another tear.

"Then be the one that gives me my most ardent desire. No matter how it affects his perception of himself, or how others will later see him, he who still gave me my deepest desire." Fearel squeezed her eyes shut and a small cascade of tears escaped.

"I will beg as long as you allow it." 

Fearel's eyes were still shut when Solas pressed his lips against hers in forgotten resolve.

"Damn it, Fearel. No man should make you beg."

His hand grazed her exposed shoulder moment before pressing down insistently, his fingers tingling with the Fade. Then she was on her back with him curved over her.

"And no other man should have you," his voice sounded almost pleading through the rough declaration as he stroked her hair. "Tonight, you belong to me. Your body," he paused, " _And your soul,_ " Solas whispered in his quiet way. His thumb traced her bottom lip before lightly dipping inside of her mouth. He shut his eyes, memorizing.

Solas moved his fingers to trace her collar bone, and then lower to her breasts. He opened his eyes to slits as he looked down at her, tracing the arc of her flesh to the nipple. His outline was dark with the moon so bright behind him. She saw a small quake of movement at the points of his ears as he touched her. Fearel felt her breast pucker beneath his touch. Solas leaned over her and followed the outside of her nipple with a singular motion from his tongue. She felt the trail of his saliva on her skin cool in the cold bedroom and her nipple hardened. He covered it completely with his mouth and tugged upward at the nipple with his teeth. She inhaled as he released her and the breast bounced back. Then he returned, suckling at her, his hot breath escaping his mouth and a strange sound from his throat.

Then his hand slid up the inside of her leg. Fearel placed the palms of both hands on his smooth head as he buried his head between her breasts and his thumb slipped between the warm layer of skin between her legs and firmly swept to her clit. She inhaled beautifully. _Solas has undoubtedly been with a woman before._ She pushed the thought away.

Then he threw himself over her, straddling her, his hands on either side of her head. His necklace dangled between them as he stared down at her, the moonlight glowing behind him.

 _He looks like.. a god._   Solas pulled his shirt over his head and removed himself from her only to slip out of his pants and rip the covers from the bed onto the floor. The moonlight made his actions look black as he stood away from her, like a thief in the room of an unprotected virgin as the covers settled to the ground. He slipped back over her and spread her legs firmly. He planted his knees between them, his hot tip firm against her stomach, the shaft pulsating against her entrance. She pushed herself up with one arm and splayed her other hand on his back, relinquishment on her face as she pulled him to her.

Solas wrapped an arm around her torso, the other cradled her head as he pulled her to him. _You don't know how many times I imagined just this. Exactly as we are. Every movement, I have envisioned a thousand times in a thousand places._ Her arms left the bed and she was clinging to him, then he was adjusting his hips, he had his hand between them tangled somewhere with their legs, he was at her opening hot and wet-

_And he was inside her. His head arched back suddenly as he entered, jaw pointed toward the ceiling as the tip of his penis made wet entry after months of longing, and with a sharp inhalation he eased out and pushed further in. He grasped her to his chest as she moaned and he pressed slowly in and out of her. Then her hair was in his hands as he pulled, forcing her head back to look into his face as he stared down at her in blank ecstasy._

_This is the face of Fen’Harel as he consumes you, as he loves you._

_His eyes narrowed as he peered into her face. He wanted to see her as he pushed himself into her as deep as her pussy would allow. He felt her fingernails rake across his back and her mouth part in a silent gasp as he deserted controlled speed and ardently fucked her. His skin slapped against hers, relinquished in pacing and wild with force, his eyes still locked with hers, his hands gripping her hair. Her breasts jumped with the aggression of his thrusts and she felt his muscles flexing beneath her fingers with each exertion of his hips. He shut his eyes, he and Fearel tangled and-_

_He pulled himself out without warning. A small sound escaped her throat. Solas straightened on his knees and placed a hand at the base of Fearel's skull and pushed up and toward him. His penis pressed against her legs as his teeth bit into her with the abandon of his kiss and he growled, turning her over almost effortlessly._

_"Ma vhenan." He placed a hand on her stomach and the other directed his cock into her. He was throbbing and dripping onto the sheets and her legs as his hands shook to place himself at her entrance again.It had been hundreds of years, hundreds. His lust and love fought as his right hand trailed over Fearel’s waist and he kneaded it tightly, building thrust with her body as he slammed into her from behind. A petite sound escaped her lips. He leaned over her, his chest on her back, his cock ramming into her. His other arm crossed her chest to an arm holding her up and he gripped it. The steady clap of his waist hitting her bottom filled the room with wild and continuously unbroken rhythm of sound. His penis was buried as deep inside her as it could go, but he still leaned in in desperation to cover himself in her slick juice._

_Gods, he was so hard. His mouth was to her back, and he stayed almost completely still but for the quick thrusts of his hips as he pounded her into a place that made her repeat his name as he always heard it when he imagined this moment- "Solas, Solas, Solas, Solas-" She whimpered his name with the intensity of the sex. She could hardly see, her vision jerking with the paroxysm of his fucking, but she could hear his skin slapping against hers, echoing around the room._

_Solas felt himself dripping inside her, his body working into a roar as her beautiful skin rippled with the impact of his thrusts. He removed himself completely from her and turned her over again. He leaned over body, panting. His skull was beaded with moisture, her hair plastered to her forehead, and he fucked her again, leaning his forehead against hers. The sound of the juice in her pussy was loud and made the blood course through her cheeks as he continued to slam against her._

_"I am going to enter you and end in you," he whispered softly, and thrust. "And you will carry me," he thrust, "Forever," another hard thrust, "And the men you ever have after me will be only a shadow in comparison." He stared fiercely at her as pulled her knee up and positioned her so it was propped up with the sole of her foot on the bed. He pulled her body as close as he could and fucked her again.  She breathed in the air he exhaled with each thrust, pressed her hands to the back of his head, pushed him closer._

_He fucked her harder, his body pushing violently inside of her, each forward movement expelling groans from his throat from behind grit teeth, his breath was becoming quicker, his ropy muscles working against her body and the thrusts rearing back further before making their mark and then-_

_Solas shuddered, inhaling verbally with his throat and hoarsely exhaling her name._

_“Fea..rel..” She shut her eyes tight and her mouth fell open as his rod pulsated, pouring his seed inside of her with such force that it overflowed, dribbling out of her. The thick, hot fluid dripped down to her ass and slid off onto the sheets. She opened her eyes again to see him staring at her as he came inside of her, wild eyes steady, staring, staring while his body spasmed and his ejaculation poured inside of her._

"Solas," she whimpered.

" _Ma vhenan_." She shuddered as he muttered the phrase and her orgasm redoubled with the soft movements of him still inside of her, still filling her with his white discharge.

"I love you…Fearel.” His halting speech came out in a whisper. “Whatever transpires after this..you must know. You are the only one that I have ever loved."

Solas pulled out with a quick breath and pushed back inside her. She closed her eyes and moaned quietly as he lay atop her, the point of his ear tipped at the ceiling and his cheek on his arm beside her, gazing at her. He shut his eyes and traced his fingers over her face.

 _I can't promise. I can't be here. I can't._ He pulled out of her and they both sharply inhaled.

" _Fenedhis_ ," he murmured. "Fearel. Come here." He drew an arm around her shoulders and pulled her to him. The sweat of their bodies was still warm as they breathed in each other’s air, staring. Fearel closed her eyes and kissed him softly on the lips.

 _He was the master of this excursion. The only one I may ever have with him_ \- Fearel clung tighter to him, burying her face below his chin. She felt another drop of seamen fall onto her leg.

“I love you, Solas.”

“ _Ma vhenan_ ,” he repeated. “I love you.” Solas felt his breathing slow and he forced his mind away from what was to come. _Just a few more moments…Where I am but a Dalish enchanter. And she is but a Dalish rouge._

They lay in silence, the Fen’Harel and the Dalish Inquisitor, avoiding the ending and enamored with wonder of each other- the fish and the bird.

Dawn was still waking to spread her fingers across the sky. Skyhold was not yet awake. Solas tore his eyes away from Fearel’s.

"Fearel..let us walk. I need to tell you about th _e Vallaslin._ "

 


End file.
